You are a fast action taker. You get things done now. If you experience a problem you cannot go to bed and it’s always on top of your mind till it’s fixed.
He takes time to make decisions. He is slower, methodical and sees the glass as half empty.
You argue about a communication problem you have. You want to talk about it and get to the bottom of the problem. You spoke to a therapist, did the research and know how to fix your situation.
But when you talk to him about it, he shuts down. He is cold and distant and says “I’ll think about it”
When faced with this situation, it’s easy to assign blame or think in a negative way about your partner.
You think he is distant and does not want to confront the issue. You push harder but it’s frustrating.
He thinks you want to get your own way. Nothing seems to be wrong and does not see the need to deal with the issue right now.
We all have different personality types. Some of us are fast action takers.
Your spouse process information slowly, makes slow decisions but when they do make a change it last for a long time.
We are constantly trying to get a result or fix our marriage problem assuming our spouse has the same personality style as we do.
It leads to more pain, frustration and resistance.
Or you can chose to understand his or her personality style and know how to talk to them so that you get the result you want.
The choice is not an easy one. It’s tempting to communicate the way you always been doing it.
Embrace their personality type.
It may take a little longer but the results you get lasts for a long time.